Joelology - Kush and Lyrikz: The Director’s Cut (Part Two): “Social Justice Bloggers Can Shove Their Trigger Warnings Up Their Asses”

I split this into two parts. Firstly, to give a detailed explanation of how KushandLyrikz was created, train of thought and everything. This, this is dedicated to the people who got easily offended, the people who threw out their trigger warnings and whatever. This is essentially, a whole ‘nother rant. So take this as a second dose of a lesson in Joelology.

Before this second part begins, let me once again say this (if you are a person who missed the first part). KushandLyrikz was a satire blog. It was a parody of HpLyrikz and KushandWizdom. It was not serious at all. If you took it seriously, chances are you gave the reaction that was what the blog was aiming for.

Anyway. Let’s begin.

During the process of KushandLyrikz’s existence, we had to deal with a lot of things. People trying to be the white knights of Tumblr. Telling us that we’re scum and so on. Then last week, someone told us we should be lynched and submitted a picture of some dude who got lynched. Which is the kind of hate we’d expect, but still, it was fucking annoying. But this was proof that Tumblr has some gullible people and those who cannot detect satire. I mean, it got to the point where there were parodies…of a parody. It was stupid as hell. Then you got those memes popping up with KushandLyrikz swag notes. Which was stupider.

This whole part two. It’s dedicated to those who got offended. It’s dedicated to that one person who reported the blog.

The people who took the blog seriously. They are stupid. It was to the point where some of us wanted to just tell them to stop. Because they were making themselves look stupid. We had Che gunning down every person who tried to be smart — which was hilarious. But when I looked at those who messaged us, I learned two things:

• How stupid people can be on Tumblr.
• How racist people can be on Tumblr.

The first bullet point. That’s self-explanatory. You saw people running around, flailing their arms like a wacky inflatable arm flailing tube man on here. Going on their crusades about how some people would see this and get influenced by it. No, no they won’t. Because nobody is that fucking stupid. We know stupid people exist. But nobody is going to burn their house down for a pair of Air Yeezy 2’s just because of a swag note. Nobody’s going to get what they want because they have swag. If people were going round like that, we would have a whole lot of dead people right now. Sometimes it was hilarious and sometimes it was infuriating how stupid people were.

Then we had the popular blogs trying to make fun of a parody blog. That’s what they were doing. They were basically trying to cash in on the success of KushandLyrikz and the actual attention it got. They did it to make themselves seem smarter than they were. We had this blogger who runs a ‘funny blog’ putting up one of the many memes of Kush and Lyrikz. It made him and everyone who reblogged it look like a bunch of stupid bastards. 

Then we had a case of racists. We had people calling us every racist name under the sun. Niggers, coons, chinks and whatever. Yes, we got called chinks. It was ridiculous. I never knew so much racial hate laid within Tumblr users. It’s as if they saw something they didn’t like and decided to go on a racial rampage. Then we had people glorifying James Holmes and other murderers asking us whether they had swag. 

If you were stupid enough to believe KushandLyrikz was real, you really, really, really need to check yourself. That also goes for that person who reported us. That’s right, the person who put the nail in the coffin. In fact, this goes out to all you social justice bloggers who are throwing out trigger warnings like it’s fucking candy at Halloween.

Who the hell are you? Who the hell are all of you? All of you pretty much sap the life out of anything that can be remotely considered offensive. And by remotely offensive, I’m talking about jokes. You all spend time on such insignificant things you all ‘consider racist’ or ‘offensive’ or ‘sexist’, cry about it with your trigger warnings and all your fancy (and irrelevant) terminology then totally ignore bigger issues. We’ve had so many people hating on KushandLyrikz that they totally forgot the incorrect ideals that were being pushed by HpLyrikz and KushandWizdom. The exploitation of the youth that they were doing. They totally forgot that there were actually people on here, that were on the dicks of murderers. 

But this one person. This one person, turquoisepassion she went the extra mile. Nobody that we had known of reported the blog. But she felt that she was doing the world of Tumblr good by getting the blog deleted. To stop people from being ‘triggered’. What kind of sorry ass bullshit is that? Stop people from being triggered? It’s the internet. There’s bound to be things that offend. I dislike racism. I know a forum like Stormfront exists. I don’t get racially triggered every time the site comes up. In fact, I just ignore it and move along. It’s not like KushandLyrikz was in your face. It wasn’t like we rammed it down your throat like you were a hooker. You could have easily just ignored the blog. Better yet, there’s an invention. I heard it’s a really great one. It’s called the block button. If you saw it, you could have blocked us from ever appearing on your blog.

But I’m not stopping there. You go around saying that the people who started KushandLyrikz is salty. In actual fact, you are the one that is salty. Nobody would ever go the extra mile you did. In fact, nobody would do it for any other reason other than to be:

• A ‘white knight’ on Tumblr.
• To get themselves more well-known.
• To give them an ego-boost.

And you may deny the second bullet point, but all evidence points towards this. You wanted your fifteen-minutes of Tumblr fame. Just like those girls who submit topless pictures to luk3y, you most probably wanted to be the one known as ‘that person who reported KushandLyrikz’. If you didn’t think this, why would you make a post titled ‘mwahahaha’ and then type this:

got the blog kushandlyrikz suspended

they deserved it too, nothing more than a bunch of pricks running a hateful blog filled to the brim with rape ableist. 

Nice to see you deleted the post, though. In fact, real nice to see you deleted every post that was made towards you — correcting everything that you’ve said. It was clear that you wanted everyone to know that you were the one who reported the blog. Just like the kids who are hyped up on they Call of Duty games telling everyone that they know that they got a MOAB, you wanted to be that person. And calling us ‘pricks’? Really? Really? What a contradiction, because you see, you say that we ran a hateful blog…when you’re hating on us in the same sentence. Also, none of us condoned rape. Every ask that we received, none of us actually condoned rape. None of us said: “HEY, YOU CAN RAPE PEOPLE IF YOU HAVE SWAG GUYS! MMMKAY!” If you actually understood what satire is, then you would have understood that it was a joke. Nobody thinks like that. If anybody did, do you think they would still be here? They’d be in a mental asylum. And don’t worry, it’s not just you. There’s plenty of other ‘trigger warning’ types around.

And I’m sick of it. They can all shove their trigger warnings up their asses. They suck the LIFE out of things. They’re like that friend you know that kills jokes. Because you can’t do anything without one of them trying to get their nose in it. Make a funny joke. Social justice blogger is on your tail. Say something isn’t offensive. You have a social justice blogger on your tail. Say you’re still going to eat at Chick-Fil-A. Social justice blogger will give you a thousand reasons why not to and they’ll give you links to Tumblr blogs on here explaining social justice and other bullshit. You can’t do anything. It’s like they’re trying to police the internet. But what they forget is…the internet is going to be offensive. The internet is going to do these things. And if you don’t like it, you can easily ignore it. Everyone has the power to ignore. Instead, most of them get trigger happy and label everything with trigger warnings.

Nobody gives a fuck about your goddamn trigger warnings. On the internet, they’re useless. Let’s go through what a trigger is: 

• gives you flashbacks of traumatic events
• sends you into an agonizing panic attack
• makes your heart skip beats from sheer terror

it does not

• mildly offend you
• make you feel uncomfortable
• gross you out
• make you angry

I highly doubt reading something on the internet is going to give you flashbacks of traumatic events. It won’t send you into an agonizing panic attack or make your heart skip a beat from sheer terror. If your heart does skip a beat from reading something offensive, you most probably need to see a doctor.

I’m going to wrap this up with an important message: you can’t police the internet. You can’t even try. Stop being so offended at little things. Stop labeling everything with trigger warnings.

Class dismissed. 

Wait, no, come back, sit your asses down. I’m not done. I’m also sick of the people who claim to be feminist and just shit on everything males do. You’re giving feminists a bad name with your warped perception of what it actually is. Constantly going on about how men are bad is not the actual feminist idea. It was to fight for equality. Shout out to the real feminists, but the fake ones who thinks it’s all about saying ‘fuck you’ to men. You need to sit the fuck down and shut up.

Now it’s dismissed.